Thursday, October 21, 2010

You're Fired!!

Happy Friday! Happy weekend! I must start by offering an apology to all of you. I learned a valuable lesson last week….don’t trust a strange monkey with important work. I was horrified when I read last week’s blog and discovered that Preston had added his own comments and opinions. I truly believed that he was tippy tapping exactly what I said with no embellishment. I will never publish anything again without reading it first.
I don’t like to read my own writings once I’m done, so I don’t go back and reread my blogs. I would never have known what Preston had done if it wasn’t for the ruckus in my yard Saturday morning….

There was a crowd of animals, most of whom I recognized from the job interviews, protesting on our back deck. Their signs were all in reference to Friday’s blog. Since I knew nothing about Preston’s additions, I was at a loss. When I walked out on the deck, the crowd booed – you know I was horrified. I had to keep myself from crying.
“What is going on?” I asked incredulousy, “Where are your hats?” The crowd booed again. “Please tell me, I have no idea!!” I pleaded. The raccoon waved his sign at me and said he and the rest of the job applicants did not appreciate being called losers. They also felt Preston was given preferential treatment because he was so good looking – why else would I keep talking about how handsome he was in the blog? I assured them I had no idea what they were talking about, but I was going inside right then to reread my blog.
As it turned out, Preston had insulted me as much as anyone else! I was so mad at Preston I couldn’t think straight. I knew what I had to do. I ran upstairs to my hat rack and started picking out hats. The animals knew that I expected all visitors to be properly chapeaued, so they had purposely not worn their hats. I carried the pile of hats downstairs and stopped in the kitchen to whip up some snacks. I knew it was going to be hard to quiet everyone down to listen to me, but the fastest way to calm down distraught animals is to offer them some tasty snacks.
The crowd was still waving their signs and booing when I went out to put the hats on the deck. I quickly ran back inside and prepared to begin making amends. The crowd stopped booing immediately when I walked out with a tray of snacks. One by one they came up to select a nosh.

Everyone found something to their liking. Once I had them all calm, I began to explain what happened. I told the critters that Preston had written the snide comments unbeknownst to me. I pointed out that there were several comments alluding to the fact that I was not very bright. Why would I right something derogatory about myself? The animals all looked at each other and shook their heads in agreement. They apologized for making a scene and upsetting me. I told them I was sorry too and I would never publish a blog without first reading it very carefully. That meant I would have to fire Preston. I had a feeling he really didn’t like me anyway, so I didn’t think there would be any hard feelings.
We all sat and finished out snacks. We had a lovely time chatting and getting to know one another. Just as we had decided out bellies were full, Preston arrived for work. I told the others that I needed to speak to Preston alone. I told them to pick any hat they would like from the pile and take it with them. They each carefully chose a hat and put them on for their walk home – much better!! They grabbed their signs on their way out and were swatting each other with them and giggling as they left the yard.
I told him that I did not like what he did with the blog and I was very disappointed in him.

He apologized but could not promise he would not do something like that again. I thanked him for his time and told him his services would no longer be needed. Boy, hiring someone is a lot more fun than firing them!
I hope you have a great weekend and a productive week. And remember, never trust a strange monkey with important work!!

Love & licks,

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