Thursday, September 30, 2010

Panthers and Tigers and Tabbys, Oh My!

Happy Friday! Happy weekend! I hope Fall has finally fallen on you wherever you live. It’s creeping into NC and I hope it sticks around. I have sweated enough this summer – and sweating is very unladylike!!
While lolling around pondering what to do this week, I stumbled upon an article in the newspaper about a big panthers-bengals matchup in Charlotte on Sunday. I wasn’t quite sure what they were being matched up to do, but an arena full of beautiful felines sounded like something my friends and I would definitely enjoy. I tippy tapped on Mom’s computer and bought some tickets.
I knew Charlotte was several hours away, and it was going to take more pretty girls than I could guarantee were going to be anywhere to get Tristan to drive us. While the wheels in my head continued to turn as I tried to figure out what to do, I saw an ad in the sports section offering party bus rides to see the panthers play. Oh boy! A party bus to Charlotte. I had a plan now!
I gathered up some brave souls to accompany me on what was to be a long, hopefully adventurous day. Brothers Matthew and Anthony were on board for it, as well as dear Felisha and newcomer Jack. You know I was never going to head out without Malcolm tagging along, so I went ahead and invited him. Evidently, these Panthers are quite popular, as I found a variety of headwear designed to support them in their endeavors. Thanks to Mom’s magic card and express mail, my friends and I were going to be properly topped for our trip!
We still had to bum a ride off my brother to get to the party bus rendezvous spot. We were so excited we arrived very early – we were the first ones there! I thought this was good – that way we could greet each one of our fellow bus riders.






We expected the bus to be full of fellow felines and possibly a human family member or two, but we were totally unprepared for the stream of human males – and a few females - that proceeded to fill the bus.
You can imagine that we received quite a few strange looks as we greeted each new arrival. Everyone was wearing black and blue attire so I knew we had gotten that right. It was a long ride to Charlotte but we had such a good time on the bus! It didn’t take long for the other bus riders to realize we were cool cats in hats. Some were kind enough to share their food and beverages with us. Needless to say, we had to apologize several times for Malcolm’s behavior. I ended up having to promise one gentlemen that I would buy him some replacement food when we arrived at the venue.
Time passed quickly and we soon arrived in this HUGE parking lot. As we descended from the bus we were in awe of the scene. The parking lot was filled with people – mostly men - partying next to their vehicles. People had tents and chairs and grills. Malcolm’s paws had barely touched the pavement when he was following his nose to some poor person’s grill. The rest of us raced after Malcolm to try and keep him from getting in trouble. We ended up meeting some very nice cat lovers who invited us to join them for hot dogs and hamburgers.



We were having a good time, but were getting excited about seeing some panthers and bengals. Jack suggested we might want to head up toward the giant building sitting in the middle of the huge parking lot. We all decided that was a good idea. We thanked our generous hosts, gave them a high paw, and headed to the big building.
We became really excited when we saw the panther statues right outside the building. These must be the very brave panthers. The statues were of the panthers looking really fierce, but Felisha and I thought we could look just as fierce! What do you think?



Each one of us wanted to be the first inside so we rushed to the door. The ticket taker looked at us funny when we scurried up and handed him our tickets. The parking lot scene was nothing compared to what was happening inside! So many people! So much blue! No other cats! We looked around but didn’t see any panthers or tigers. They must be down that tunnel at the end preparing to come out and do whatever it is they do. We just assumed there would be some massive wrestling match or mouse catching contests.
With some help from a kind usher, we found our seats.




We sat nice and orderly for a few minutes until Matthew decided we needed to say hello to our fellow felines in the tunnel. Anthony thought his brother was right and led the way down to the field.
On the way down, we passed some cheerleaders who took a liking to pretty Felisha and made her an honorary cheerleader. They gave her a skirt and some blue and black pom poms so she could cheer along. Felisha was very excited – she just hoped she knew exactly when to cheer!
Before we reached the tunnel, we spied one of them – a panther!! He didn’t look like your usual feline - he was freakishly big and was walking on his hind legs. This must be a special breed of competition quality feline. We rushed up to him to say hello. He didn’t say anything, though he scooped up Felisha to give her a hug and patted each one of us on the head.



We asked him where the rest of the panthers were and he pointed to the tunnel – we were right!
The panther – we later found out his name was Sir Purr – motioned for us to follow him to the tunnel. When we arrived there, we were disappointed that there weren’t more panthers – just men in helmets and tight pants – really tight pants. We hung around for a while and received many pets and scratches from the helmeted men. I couldn’t imagine what they were going to be doing that would require such attire. Before I could ask someone to enlightenment me, Sir Purr picked up a big flag and started to run down the tunnel. He waved for us to follow. As we emerged from the tunnel there was a deafening roar from the crowd and lots of hoopla! The cheerleaders were all jumping up and down on the sidelines - making pyramids and tossing each other in the air. Matthew and I grabbed Felisha and tossed her in the air – such a cute little cheerleader!



The helmeted guys ran out behind us and started banging into each other and making loud grunting noises getting pumped up for what was about to happen. We saw a Bengal tiger walking on two legs down at the other end of the field. He had led his team out of their tunnel and they, too, we preparing for the big game. His guys had these cool tiger striped helmets – I really liked them!
We hung out with Sir Purr for the rest of the game – a football game. It was really cool. We got to stay on the sidelines and see all the action up close. Sir Purr helped us understand the rules of the game, but mostly we had fun just cheering and jumping up and down. Unfortunately, the panthers lost, but it was a lot of fun anyway.
When it was over, we said goodbye to Sir Purr and headed for the bus back home. The bus was much more subdued on the way back – everyone was exhausted. On the way home, Malcolm decided he must be a panther because he was all black. He was just like a panther, only smaller. He swapped hats with Matthew and declared we must call him Sir Malcolm from now on.





We napped most of the way home and were very happy to pull up to the parking lot where Tristan was going to pick us up to take us home. He was there as promised and was very patient while we all talked at once telling him about our exciting experience.
Tristan dropped everyone at their homes and when we arrived at our house he had to pick me up and carry me in because I was fast asleep.
I hope my friends had as much fun as I did. We’ll have to do that again sometime. I hear that football goes on most of the winter so there will be plenty of other opportunities.
Hope you enjoy your weekend. Check out the Sunday football games and root for you favorite team – it’s fun!

Love & licks,
Josie

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Mr. DeMille, I'm Ready for My Close-up!

Happy Friday! Happy weekend! We are still waiting for Fall to arrive here in North Carolina – we had temperatures in the 90’s every day this week! I was tired from the fair goings on last week, so I thought my friends and I would just lay low and chill at the movies.
I had seen a commercial on television for a movie called “Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore.” That sounded like a movie that a pack of cats should see together! I rounded up a bunch of my feline friends who were cinema aficionados. My new friend Ernie wanted to come along as well as dear friends Rocky and Felisha. Of course Malcolm was not to be left behind!
We needed a ride, of course, so we told my brother that there were lots of pretty girls at the movies if he was man enough to go to a chick flick. He wasn’t too thrilled with that idea, but there was a good action movie showing, so he agreed to give us a ride. While we all were getting in the car I noticed that Malcolm was not wearing his usual KFC bucket on his head. He had worn it on all of our recent adventures, so I knew something was up. When I questioned him about it, he mumbled something about the theater not having any chicken but not allowing outside food. He then went off in a huff and plopped himself in the backseat of the car, I don’t know what he meant by that, but his brightly colored high hat certainly looked more than a little silly!
By the looks of the ticket line, we were the only non-humans attending this particular showing of the movie… or so we thought.





When we reached the ticket booth, I whipped out my Mom’s magic plastic card and paid for all the tickets. After the nice young lady swiped the card and gave us our tickets, she reached for a stack of these funny looking glasses and gave each one of us a pair. She explained that the movie was in 3-D and we needed to wear these glasses to get the full effect. Evidently with these glasses things were going to look like they were coming off the screen at us – cool!
When we entered the theater we saw that there were, indeed, other animals at this show…dogs. I saw the potential for some trouble but we nodded hello and took our seats. The one thing that seemed to help was that we all looked silly in the 3-D glasses. We sat pointing and giggling at each other as we waited for the show to start. One of the dogs was wearing a shirt which struck me as odd, but I figure a bunch of cats wearing hats probably struck him as odd as well!
As we watched other mover goers enter the theater, we noticed that many of them had food and drinks. Bernie – the St. Bernard – told us that there was a snack bar in the lobby. He said he was dying for some Sno-Caps, but he didn’t have any extra money. I told him about my Mom’s magic plastic card and offered to purchase a snack for him and anyone else who was hungry. I figured that would help the dog – cat relationship in the theater because I knew the movie was going to show dogs and cats at odds. Well, that opened the floodgate and it turned out that everyone wanted a snack and/or beverage!!! I took several of my friends with me to help carry all the food. Oddly enough, Malcolm was the only one who did not ask for any food. Now, THAT was weird!
When we returned with the food I saw that Malcolm had turned his hat upside down and it was filled with fried chicken. He had put the chicken in the hat and then put it on his head. He had been walking around all this time with chicken in his hat! We distributed the food and settled in for the movie.
The 3-D effects were really fun and sometimes kind of scary. We screamed and laughed and cheered – sometimes all at once!




Halfway through the movie we ran out of food. Everyone was enjoying the movie and didn’t want to miss any of it. Since I had the magic plastic card I would have to go, and Bernie was nice enough to offer to help. I asked if he thought that just the two of us could do it and he said yes. Turned out he was right! (Though I did drop the Mild Duds!)





Now that everyone had sustenance, we could all enjoy the rest of the movie. We thoroughly enjoyed the movie and all stood and applauded when it was over. Kitty Galore was a great villain and a very bad kitty, so she needed to be stopped. We said goodbye to our new doggie friends and started to the aisle to head home. I noticed lots of food wrappers, cups and chicken bones on the floor where we were sitting. We had started to pick up the trash when a theater employee told us not to worry about it – he would take care of it. I felt bad leaving so much of a mess, but at least we had piled it in the aisle so the worker could just bag it up. It made me realize that we had eaten A LOT!



As we headed out we asked the girl in the ticket booth if we had to return the 3-D glasses. She said no, they were ours to keep! Wow! Free souvenirs! Maybe I’ll use them to watch TV from now on!
Our little group chatted about their favorite parts of the movie while we stood and waited for Tristan to get out of his movie. Standing out in the heat after eating all of that food was not a good idea, and several of us began to feel queasy. We were trying t be polite, but we figured we would feel much better if we let out some burps. Just as we were ready to start the relief effort, Tristan pulled up - he had somehow gotten past us. We all jumped in the car and commenced letting out some very large belches…not burps…belches. Ooooh, that felt so good. Felisha was the ever proper little lady. She put her paw to her mouth and made the tiniest burp I had ever heard. She giggled and excused herself. As I started to laugh at her little teeny tiny burp I let out a loud one. We all laughed ourselves even sicker. Tristan was VERY happy when we arrived home.
Hope you have a wonderful weekend. Grab a bunch of friends, some soda and popcorn and go see a movie- maybe even a 3-D one. Everyone can use a pair of free cool glasses!
Love & licks,
Josie

Thursday, September 16, 2010

A Fair to Remember

Happy Friday! Happy weekend! Happy Fall! Happy County Fair! I hope the county you live in has a fair like the county I live in. The Cumberland County Fair opened this week and it is quite the sight to see. I should know because I’ve seen it!
My friends and I had gone to the little carnival in the parking lot of the Food Lion, and that was a good warm up for what awaited us at the county fair. While the carnival had rides and a midway, the fair has all sorts of exhibits, concerts, competitions and animals. It didn’t take much asking to find a few friends to share in some fair fun. Felisha hadn’t come on an adventure with me lately and I missed her, so she was first on my list of friends to invite along. Jibbers and Cami seemed to enjoy the carnival, so I figured they would get a kick out of the fair. My trusty sidekick and ever hopeful voice of reason, Bobbi, agreed to tag along as well. I had seen Corny heading out for the Walmart earlier in the day and had invited him to come along and he said he would fly by the fair when he was finished his parking lot greeter shift.
We had to get a ride to the fair, so we told my brother, Tristan, that there were going to be packs of pretty girls roaming all around the fairgrounds. Since there really were scantily clad women at the beach as we had promised last time, he agreed to be our chauffeur. Since I didn’t want to spend all our time at the food stands, I hadn’t mentioned the fair to Malcolm. The four of us crept out the front door and tip toed to the car looking around to see if Malcolm was lurking somewhere. We scurried the last few feet and flung open the door and jumped in the car and landed right on top of Malcolm. After he extracted himself from the pile of critters, he explained that he had been under the deck and had heard us plan our expedition. He just knew we wanted him to come along! I figured it would probably be a good idea to have another male for Jibbers to hang out with, so I didn’t say anything about Malcolm coming along. But somehow I knew Malcolm was going to be trouble…..
As we neared the fair site, we could see all the lights and giant rides rising up over the horizon. Bobbi started getting nervous when she saw a ride with a giant arm swinging around wildly. She made me promise that we would NOT go on that ride. I told her not to worry since I was more interested in the other activities and not the rides.
After Tristan found a parking space, he turned to us and told us to meet him back at the car in 2 hours. I promised we would try – but since none of us wore a watch (or could even tell time for that matter) it would be hit or miss. Tristan drew a picture of what the clock would look like in two hours and entrusted it to me. I put it under my hat and prayed I would not lose it in all the fun.
As we wandered down the midway we made note of what we wanted to do later. We decided that first we would check out the exhibits. We went into this HUGE room – the expo center. As soon as Malcolm spied the food he was gone. I yelled after him that the food was for exhibit and not to be eaten. I was hoping he heard me or we would be heading home sooner that we wanted to!
The rest of the gang and I wandered up and down the aisles looking at all the beautiful animals. Rabbits, chickens, goats, sheep – all the barnyard varieties of animals were there. I was hoping none of our little group would be scooped up and placed on a judge’s table! There was some judging going on at one end of the expo center. Since I love a good competition, we walked down to where the judging was going on. Much to my dismay, there was Malcolm standing at the table with the other entrants. I tried to motion to him to step away, but he thought I was waving at him, so he waved back. I shook my head no, but it was too late. The judge walked up to the table to start evaluating the entrants’ chickens.






I couldn’t watch so we headed back out toward the midway. A few minutes later Malcolm came running out of the exhibition hall – a moment later his bucket of chicken came flying out the door also. Evidently, the judge was not amused. I have a feeling the chickens were not amused either!
Before we reached the midway, we saw a crowd of people standing around an oval pen. We asked someone what was going on and they replied that everyone was waiting for the pig races to begin. Pig races?!?!??!?! Pigs don’t race. I know horses and dogs have been known to race, but not pigs!! This I had to see. We joined the folks milling about, but when I turned to say something to Bobbi, she was gone. So was Cami. I asked Jibbers and Felisha if they knew where they had gone, but they said they had no idea. Suddenly, a bell rang and the little gate opened up and the racing pigs came jumping out. . I felt bad that Bobbi and Cami were going to miss the pig races – until I turned to watch the race.





There were Bobbi and Cami just having a good ol’ time jockeying a couple of pigs. They were just bouncing up and down like crazy on the backs of the pigs. Poor Cami could hardly hold on and she had to grab her pig’s ears to keep from falling off. Even though neither Bobbi’s nor Cami’s pig won, they had a great time and were just giggling away when we met up with them after the race.
Next we came upon a bunch of ponies. Their owner was giving free pony rides. While Bobbi and Cami had had enough riding for one day, Felisha, Jibbers and I decided we would partake in the more sedate riding experience. We found some appropriate riding hats, and jumped aboard.





I had never ridden a real pony before, and I just loved the rhythm of the pony’s steps. We pretended we were moseying along on the range. I was sad when our time was up. I patted my pony on the nose and thanked him for the ride. Felisha and Jibbers also enjoyed the ride!
We found someone with a watch and compared the picture Tristan had drawn to the watch’s face. It looked like we still had plenty of time to continue our fair experience. Felisha suggested we might have fun playing one of the many games on the midway. But which one? We wandered up and down the rows of games until we came to the perfect one. I’m afraid of clowns and nothing would please me more than shooting a clown with water until his head exploded. Well, maybe it was more like shooting the clown in the mouth until a balloon on top of its head popped. Either way, I liked the idea of shooting at clowns!
Malcolm had wandered off toward the funnel cake stand, so it was up to the rest of us to take on the clowns. I learned very quickly that ferrets are quite the good shots with water pistols. One after another, Jibbers popped his clown’s balloon. I did win one time, but I know Jibbers was being nice and let me win. That’s okay – it was fun hearing the balloon pop! Corny showed up to cheer us on.








Every now and then one of us would “accidently” hit him with some water and he would squawk and flap his wings. After a while he grew tired of us soaking him and headed home. He was tired from working all day anyway, so he needed to go get some rest.
After all his winning, Jibbers had this huge pile of tickets. We had spent a lot of time at that game, and we figured it was probably time to head back to the car. Jibbers piled his tickets on the shelf and told the attendant he was ready to redeem them. We were all anxious to see what he had won. When the attendant walked up with this giant bear we all gasped. Wow! We all thought it was great until we realized we would have to somehow carry it to the car. I sent Bobbi to find Malcolm, and when they returned we all got together and hoisted it up and started toward the parking lot.





The walk back to the car seemed a lot longer than the walk from the car to the fair. I guess schlepping a big bear makes it seem that way! Tristan was waiting at the car and when he spied us he ran up to carry Jibber’s trophy for him. He sat the bear in the car with us which must have looked funny to people passing us on the road. Tristan was nice enough to drive Jibbers and Cami to their house so he could help them take the bear inside. Tristan rang the doorbell and Jibber’s and Cami’s Mom was very surprised when she saw the bear. We all waved to her from the car and she laughed and waved back.
We dropped Felisha off next. I promised her I would not let it go so long between adventures and I would see her again soon. She politely thanked Tristan for the ride home and gave me a big hug before heading into her house. It was time to head to our house and take a nice long nap after all the excitement of the fair. The fair is open for over a week, so I think I will be going back again.
Hope you have a wonderful weekend. If there’s a fair in town make sure to go – you’ll have a blast!

Love & licks,
Josie

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Surfs Up!

Happy Friday! Happy weekend! Hope you all took advantage of the gorgeous summer weather and spent the last weekend of summer lounging on the beach. That’s what some of my friends and I decided to do.
We needed my brother to drive us to the beautiful Carolina coast, so Bobbi and I started talking about all the bikini clad babes that would most definitely be sunbathing on the beach. It didn’t take long before he volunteered to take us. Bobbi and I are two smart critters!
I called Sonar and invited her to come along. I heard she was a plucky sort and thought she might like to join me on one of my adventures. She was very happy to be included, and was at my front door ready to go right on time!
I thought it would be fun to have two hunky men accompany us womenfolk to the beach. I checked with Matthew and Anthony to see if they were free, and much to my delight, they were! I asked them if they would mind if a squirrel joined us. I know there are many cats who cannot help themselves – when they see a squirrel they have to chase it. The boys assured me they would respect my friend and not chase her. With that all settled, we piled in the car and headed for fun in the sun!
It took a couple of hours to get there, but it was worth the ride. We all bounded out of the car and headed toward the sand. Once we hit the beach, sand was flying everywhere. We just ran and laughed – the sand felt funny between our toes. We suddenly noticed that everyone was looking at us. We calmed ourselves down and started looking for a place in which to settle.
One beach activity I always found so funny was when someone was buried in the sand by their friends. I mentioned it to the others in my party and Matthew immediately volunteered to be buried. Before I could tell the others to go to work, they were already digging away, throwing dirt on top of handsome Matthew. Tristan found a bucket in the back of his car that he let us use. Since Matthew is so nice and slim, it didn’t take much sand to cover him up. When we were finished we all stepped back and started to laugh. Matthew was just a head – he had no body!!!! We asked him if he wanted to get out, but he said no. He liked when people passed by and noticed him. I thought we should at least give him some cold milk to keep him cool, and an umbrella hat to keep him in the shade. Much to our delight, that made him look even more amusing.!




We all sat and had some milk while deciding what to do next. Something daring and adventurous I would hope. Out in the ocean we could see some surfers. I looked at Bobbi and she closed her eyes and started shaking her head “no” while quietly saying “no,no,no Josie.” I looked at Matthew’s head and I didn’t know if he couldn’t shake it or he was in for the adventure. Anthony seemed a little nervous, but he got swept up in my enthusiasm and agreed to give surfing a try.
Off we went to the water’s edge to find a kind surfer willing to loan us a surfboard. I’d send dashing Anthony to ask the girl surfers and I asked the guy surfers. It turned into a competition to see who could get a surfboard, and I eventually persevered! A kind gentleman with a very large surfboard thought his board we be perfect for us. Since Matthew was still up to his neck in sand, we had to excuse ourselves for a moment and go unbury him.
The five of us scurried back and jumped on the surfboard. The surfboard’s owner was kind enough to push us out into the ocean. It was a bit scary. If we didn’t hit the wave just right water would pour on top of us. Since cats do not look very good when wet, we told our new friend to be very careful. We made it out pretty far and when the first wave came by just right, we were on it!!! Whoooooooaaaaa! It was tough keeping one’s balance on the wet board, but all four of us managed to hang on.




We glided in looking like quite the experienced surfers. When we made it back to shore, we got a round of applause from our fellow beachgoers! We all took a bow and thanked our navigator. On to the next beach activity!
We thought we should go back to some sand activity - a much more sedate and dry endeavor. Since we had a bucket, I suggested we build a sandcastle. The others were up to the task. Bobbi worked on the lower areas, and we taller cats worked on the higher. We ended up being a very creative bunch and our sandcastle was the hit of the beach.





We sat for a while and talked about trying to start up a game of beach volleyball, but somewhere during the conversation some of us fell asleep…






Fortunately, Tristan came along after a while and woke us up. Good thing – I didn’t need a sunburned nose! He told us we needed to head home. I had that sandy, salty, wind blown feel to my fur, so I agreed it was time to go!
There was much napping and snoring on the drive home. Going to the beach wears one out! I was glad to have finished the summer with a day of beach fun. I think my friends had a good time too. Now I’m ready for the temperatures to go down and the leaves start falling. Let Fall begin!!
Love & licks,
Josie

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Summer Rerun

I knew eventually I would have a week when I wouldn't be able to present you with a gripping new story. I have been working on my book, and Mom has been working crazy hours, so I have decided to take advantage, in this last week of summer, of the summer rerun. While television shows air reruns most of the summer, I will opt for just one week of a rerun in the last six months. The following rerun proved to be one of my most popular stories, and is one of my personal favorites. My new friends may not have seen this yet, and my old friends might enjoy a reread. Have a great week and I hope to return to my usual storytelling splendor next week!

Happy Friday! Happy weekend! Welcome to Wal-Mart!! Okay, well, maybe not welcome to Wal-Mart. But didn’t I make you feel welcome? I had been promising Corny for weeks that I would go with him to Wal-Mart so he could teach me to be a Wal-Mart parking lot greeter in case he ever needed to take a day off. Despite all his silliness, Corny is very serious about his work and would never want to leave the Walmart parking lot unattended. We decided it would be a good idea if Bobbi came along also in case I wasn’t available when Corny needed his vacation. I am a busy girl!
Corny has been a self-designated parking lot greeter for as long as I’ve known him. He looks very official in his vest, name tag and hat. Evidently, when a Wal-Mart employee becomes an ex-Wal-Mart employee, they don’t take their Wal-Mart paraphernalia with them and Corny takes it off their hands. He had a lovely collection of vests and hats for us to choose from, though we did have to do some alterations for them to fit properly. Corny had gone to the trouble of making us name tags – I didn’t even know he could write or spell. Corny is a lot smarter than he lcets on!
I had my brother give Bobbi and I a ride to Wal-Mart where we rendezvoused with Corny who obviously did not need a ride. Oh, to be able to fly wherever you want to go – must be nice. We met up and prepared to train.





Corny inspected us and deemed us good enough to join the proud legion of Wal-Mart parking lot greeters. I had to be honest. I had heard of Wal-Mart greeters, but never parking lot greeters. I asked Corny about it and he seemed quite insulted – I think I almost lost the job! He explained that the first impression is made on someone as they get out of their car. They could have a bad experience in the parking lot which would ruin their whole Wal-Mart experience. No greeter inside could undo a bad experience outside. Ooooookay. I’ll go with that. If it made Corny happy, I would gladly help out.
Things were unusually slow at the Wal-Mart so we decided to go find people to greet. There was a couple hanging out by the shopping carts, so we went over there for Corny to show us what to do.




Corny cawed at them and almost dropped his cigarette. They ignored us. He flapped his wings and cawed again. The girl looked over at him and sort of smiled while her friend just ignored us. Couldn’t he see us? Good heavens! We were three animals wearing hats and vests!!!! We finally gave up and left to look for people who appreciate being greeted. As we walked away we started giggling about the funny outfit the guy was wearing. Maybe that’s why he didn’t look at us – he was too embarrassed that he was still in his pajamas!
Knowing what a social animal I am, Corny decided that I should greet the next customer that got out of his or her car. We waited a few minutes and then watched as a car pulled up and parked. I trotted over to the car and put on my best smile and beamed as I meowed “Welcome to Wal-Mart!”






The woman was startled, but she smiled when she saw my smile and enthusiasm. I was a natural at this. She told me she was new to the area and needed to buy some food for her dog and cat. I knew there was a reason I liked her! She was an animal person. She asked if I could show her where the pet food aisle was. I really had no idea, but I figured it was better to be lost in Wal-Mart with company than to be lost in Wal-Mart alone. The nice lady followed me into the Wal-Mart. Fortunately, the inside greeter was a slacker and wasn’t at their post. I snuck inside and walked as if I knew where I was going. I could smell the cat food, so it didn’t take too many aisles before I found it.





The lady was very thankful and complimented me on what a great job I was doing. She gave me a scratch behind my ears, I purred loudly, then headed back to the parking lot to join my co-workers.
Bobbi was a little shy, so we worked as a team. We didn’t greet everyone though. We skipped the folks with gun racks mounted in their trucks. Not that I was worried about anything, but I thought it would be safer for Bobbi and Corny. After awhile Corny had decided we were doing such a good job that he could pretty much just hang out on top of the big lights and smoke cigarettes. After a couple of hours we were worn out. It was hot and we were in need of something cool to drink. Corny knew of a soft drink machine inside and he had found some change in the parking lot we could use. We hung out by the door until the inside greeter wandered away again. We scampered into the lobby and before we reached the drink machine we spied some cool looking shopping carts. I just couldn’t resist. Poor Bobbi kept telling me to stay away – nothing good could come of us wreaking havoc in the Wal-Mart. She told me it really wouldn’t look good to be thrown out of a Wal-Mart. I said we could just sit on it and pretend we were riding around – like we did with the coin horses. Bobbi and Corny thought that would be okay. We all climbed aboard. It was cool!
Then something happened. I’m not sure what, but all of a sudden we were driving into the store. It was an electric basket and I don’t what one of us did to start it moving. Poor Bobbi almost fell off, but she grabbed the basket and stood on the floor of the cart like she was surfing. Corny squawked with glee as he sat on top of the basket with his feathers ruffling in the breeze! We raced up and down aisles with Corny’s squawking acting as a horn to alert people to get out of the way. Bobbi was having fun pretending to surf and she chirped with delight. It would have been a lot of fun if I wasn’t so afraid of being thrown out. My Mom and Dad shop there and I didn’t want to jeopardize their shopping rights. I pushed any button I could find until the basket finally stopped – at the pet food aisle.





I guess folks thought we part of some kind of promotional stunt because we didn’t get thrown out. We still thought it was prudent to get out quickly, so we headed to the exit.
As we headed out the door we saw that my brother had returned to pick Bobbi and I up, so we thought we should call it a day. We did decide to do one last parking lot greeter task and help a couple with their bags. It felt good to help people out!




Corny told us that we did good and he would proud if we would fill in for him when he needed time off. We told him we would be happy to and promised not to ride on the electric baskets anymore. We make a good team!





Needless to say, Bobbi and I were exhausted! I gave Bobbi some peanuts before she headed off to her nest for dinner and a good night’s sleep. I had a quick bite and headed to the snuggy to catch up on my beauty rest. It was quite an interesting day! We went back to work with Corny a couple more days to make sure we were well versed in the ways of the Wal-Mart parking lot greeters.
I hope you have a great week. If you go to your local Wal-Mart keep an eye out for parking lot greeters – or maybe a crow or two on the lights. Just stay away from the electric carts – they’re wild!

Love and licks,
Josie