Thursday, January 6, 2011

Three, two, one...Happy Flea Year!

Hello My Fellow 2011ers!
Happy Friday! Happy weekend! Happy 2011! I hope your year started out fun – I know mine did! I rounded up some friends with whom to celebrate and we ended up having a very odd adventure.
Felisha, Barnaby, Malcolm and I bribed my brother into driving us to the Party in the Park event in downtown Fayetteville by offering to buy him some funnel cake. He is a fan of all things fried, so it was no surprise that he agreed to give us a lift. The first thing we did after arriving was to head to the funnel cake stand. We couldn’t believe the length of the line waiting to buy funnel cakes! We went to the end and settled in for a bit of a wait. SOME of us waited very patiently, while SOME of us with buckets on our heads tried to cut in front of others and steal food from the lucky folks who were further up the line. When it was finally our turn, we made sure to buy enough food so we wouldn’t have to wait on line again. Because the counter was so high, Felisha had to hoist me up so the server could see me.








Barnaby wanted French fries and Malcolm wanted a funnel cake all his own. Felisha and I decided we would watch our girlish figures and opted for a large bucket of diet cola. As we settled down to eat and drink, I spotted some friends over in the VIP tent. I told the others to continue enjoying their snacks and I would be right back.
I waved to Miss Mandy and Mr. Brad and they motioned for me to come over. They lifted me over the fence into the special area with free food and drinks. I poured myself a lovely fluted glass full of milk and we toasted the New Year!







I drank my milk and chatted with my friends about our New Year’s resolutions and hopes for 2011. It wasn’t long before I heard a commotion over by the funnel cake stand and saw Malcolm trying to take some of Barnaby’s French fries. The two of them were swatting at each other and Malcolm was hissing. I figured I better go play peacemaker, so I said goodbye to Miss Mandy and Mr. Brad and headed back to my feisty feral friends.
Poor Felisha was trying to calm the boys down, but they are two stubborn toms! I made them shake paws and apologize to each other and then we headed up toward the pretty bright stage lights.
The Dogwood Festival folks put on this event also, so they were well acquainted with me and my musical skills. As we approached the stage, several Dogwood staff members greeted me and asked if I was going to be entertaining the crowd. I told them I hadn’t planned on it, but I suggested to them that it would not take much arm twisting to talk me into it. After a few words of encouragement, I agreed to take the stage.
It turns out Felisha is musically inclined and she offered to join me on stage. I asked Barnaby and Malcolm if they would like to have some fun with us and Barnaby thought it he would give it a try. Malcolm mumbled something about still being hungry and skulked off to try and steal someone’s leftovers.
We took the stage and grabbed some instruments that were sitting up there. I thought Id try the fiddle and little Felisha took on the big stand up bass. Barnaby opted for a pretty acoustic guitar. We started to jam and the crowd seemed to enjoy it. I don’t know how good we were, but that’s the advantage of being a cat. – folks don’t expect you to be great. The fact you can do it at all seems to amuse them!






All too soon it was time for the headline act to go on so we had to say good night to the crowd. I’m a big fan of Hot Sauce so we stayed back stage and danced to their great music. We abruptly stopped dancing when we heard someone mention about a giant flea in Eastover that was dropping at midnight. What?!?!?!??! I knew Eastover was not that far from where I live, so I was very concerned. I have had a few unpleasant dealings with fleas and I know how annoying they can be! I mentioned about the giant flea to my friends and we felt compelled to take ourselves and our flea collars over to the poor residents of Eastover and offer our expert assistance.
We found Tristan eating his funnel cake in his car and we told him about the flea infestation. He laughed – though I don’t see what’s so funny about a flea crisis – and seemed happy to drive us there. We made a quick stop for some ammunition. We were going to be prepared!
We arrived and found the situation worse than I had feared. The first room we walked into was swarming with fleas. There were giant fleas hanging over the beauty queens’ heads just waiting to burrow into their perfectly coifed hairdos!!!!! I shrieked with horror, which seemed to draw people’s attention, unlike the fleas. Why was no one doing anything?







Though the fleas in the room were quite large, I heard people talking about the really giant flea outside. We set out to find it. Maybe it controlled the other fleas and if we captured it, the others would leave with it.
It was getting very late and we felt like we were running out of time to save these nice people. Felisha was the first to spy the ugly beast and she led us to it. The mayor of Eastover was holding it bravely, sacrificing his safety for the people in his town. We went running and screaming like banshees as we rushed to his aid and went to work spraying the ammunition we cleverly brought with us. While Barnaby and Felisha attacked the flea, I jumped up behind the mayor and applied the Advantage magic liquid just like my parenst do for me. We didn’t have a flea collar big enough for the mayor, but the flea liquid would do the trick!






The flea seemed to weaken and the mayor tied him to a pole – so he wouldn’t get away I supposed. Then the mayor started to pull the rope and lift the flea up and up and up until it was at the tippy top of the pole. How clever, I thought, he can’t bother anyone up there.! Then everyone started cheering and counting down from 10. As the crowd counted down the flea started to come down the pole. Oh no! He must have gotten loose somehow. My friends and I jumped up and grabbed the flea as soon as it was close enough.






We were still wrestling with it as it hit the ground and everyone started cheering “Happy New Year!!!!” We looked around and saw that no one seemed to care that a giant flea was about to bite them. At that moment I must have calmed down enough to look around and see things more clearly.
There were children running around with inflatable fleas with the Advantage logo on them. The littler fleas were toys, not mutant fleas!!! I took a closer look at the giant flea and noticed he had an incredibly goofy face – not like a real flea at all. I poked at him and found he was made of styrofoam and rubber. My friends and I had worked ourselves up into such a tizzy we hadn’t stopped to consider that the name of the location where we were in Eastover was… Flea Hill. Turns out the mayor and townspeople were proud of their heritage – even if it involved fleas. The giant flea was named Jasper after one of the original large landowners of Flea Hill.
I apologized to the mayor for spraying him with flea repellant and explained that we thought we were helping. He laughed and patted us all on the head and told us it was quite entertaining. He thought it was a good thing that he wouldn’t have to worry about being bitten by a flea for a long while!
The mayor invited us back for next year’s celebration. Hopefully by then I will have recovered from the trauma of battling a giant flea!
Hope you and yours have a healthy and prosperous new year!

Love & licks,
Josie

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