I have never worked in an office setting so I wasn’t sure what hat would be appropriate. I couldn’t go by Mom because she is a fashion nightmare, so I had to use my own sense of style to decide. Since I was going to be meeting lots of new people, I figured I should dress formally, yet with a little flair. Rather than throw a bucket hat on my head, I chose to start out my day in a fabulous, tres chic, number that my friend Icy bought for me. I brought along many other hats as well. I figured a hat for each different task would be appropriate.
Mom insisted that she didn’t need any help, but I think she was just too proud to admit she needed another assistant. Even as we were driving to the office, she would tell me it wasn’t too late to turn around. I stressed to Mom that I didn’t mind and that I was very excited about becoming a modern working woman! I don’t know why she seemed so stressed about the whole thing. We were going to have fun!
As soon as we arrived at Mom’s place of work, I headed straight for her office and booted up the computer. While Mom went to alert her co-workers of my presence, I went on-line to check on a few things.
I was relieved to find that the surprised kitten was on Mom’s work computer. One never knows when one might need the surprised kitten to cheer one up!
When Mom was ready to get working, she shooed me out of her chair and gave me my first task. She had a whole stack of papers that needed to be put in their respective files. That sounded easy…certainly I could do it! I found a box to stand on and set to it!
Without a thumb, this was NOT an easy task. I could sort of hold it between my toes, but I kept getting paper cuts in my delicate little paws when I tried to push the paper into the file folder. After a few tries and a few cuts, I decided that filing was not for me!
Mom thought of something else to make me productive. She promised me that shredding would be a lot easier because the shredder grabs the paper out of your hand when you push it near the opening. That sounded easy – I could do it! She turned on the machine and proceeded to slide a piece of paper down into the slot. It made a very loud grinding noise and little slivers of paper came out the bottom of the machine. Yikes! I better keep an eye on my tail! I had to make sure it didn’t do one of its flicky moves and end up as a pile of fluff in the shredder bin! I took off my boa- to avoid it being eaten by the shredder – and I went to work!
I tried to control my tail, but the more I thought about it, the more agitated I became, which made it swish around more. While I did love pulverizing paper – I wasn’t sure why - my paranoia about my tail was taking all the fun out of it!
I asked Mom if there was something else that I might do since I didn’t like paper cuts or taking the risk of losing my tail. She stared at me for a minute, sighed and handed me a stack of papers that needed to be copied. All I had to do was lay the paper in the tray and it automatically fed into the copier and both the original and the copy came out the other end. That sounded easy – I could do it! I took the stack of papers Mom had given me and laid them in the feeding tray. I pushed the big green button and the huge stack of papers started feeding through the copier. It was fun watching the paper go in side and come at with a clone of itself! I took a look at the copies so I could see how much the copies resembled the originals. When I looked at the copies I wondered why Mom had asked me to copy blank white sheets of paper?!?!?!? I called to Mom and she came into the copy room. I didn’t want to make her feel dumb, so I acted like I was proud that I learned to use the machine as I held up the blank pieces of paper. Mom grabbed her head with her hands, shook her head and informed me that I had put the originals in upside down, so I had copied the back of them. That meant I had to do it all over again.
I was careful to put the originals in so that when it fed into the copier the side with all the printing was laying face down on the glass. The second time’s the charm, and I completed my first administrative assignment! As I was collecting the copies from the tray, the empty glass caught my eye. I had seen in movies how people make copies of themselves just for fun. I peeked up and down the hallway outside the copy room and saw that no one was around. I closed the door over and jumped onto the copy machine…
I sat for a while and made several copies to give my co-workers as souvenirs of my visit. I figured they could put it on the walls of their offices like they do with the pictures of the famous people they meet. After I felt like I had done enough copies, I jumped down from the copier to admire my work…
Well, what did you think I was copying?!??!!?!??! Shame on you!!! I’m a lady!!!
I went from office to office distributing the copies of my tail. Everyone was very excited and thanked me profusely! I made sure to give one to Mom to put on her wall!
I had worked up quite a thirst, but I didn’t see any water bowls on the floor. Mom said I had to use the water cooler if I wanted a drink of water. They had these funny little cone cups with which to drink the water. I thought the cup would make a cute hat – and I was right!
I suddenly realized it looked too much like a dunce cap, so I quickly took it off and selected another hat from my collection with which to adorn my fabulous noggin.
As I headed back to Mom’s office, I noticed a blank dry erase board hanging in the hallway. There were dry erase pens just sitting on the little shelf attached to it. I thought I would create some art to brighten up the hallway. I got to work and created one of my favorite things to draw.
As I put the finishing touches on my Stick Cat Steve sketch, Mom came up to me and told me it was lunch time. We had a lovely lunch at Mi Casita – which I mistakenly thought was My Catsita. I was very disappointed there was no tuna on the menu, but they had some delightful beef dishes.
By the time we returned to the office I was exhausted. I told Mom that I needed a nap so I curled up in a box in her office and took a nap….a really long nap. Mom had to wake me up to take me to the car to go home. I felt bad I hadn’t helped all afternoon, but Mom said it was okay – she was able to get a lot done once I went to sleep. That was good…I think. Hmmmmm…
The next day I decided I was going to go back to being a housecat/adventurer. I would rather chase giant fleas up a pole (see my January 6th, 2011 blog) than file pieces of paper! I have new respect for Mom…and her thumbs!
Have a great week!!
Love & kitty kisses,
Josie
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