Thursday, September 15, 2011

A Fair to Remember

Happy Friday! Happy weekend! Happy Fall! Happy County Fair! I hope the county you live in has a fair like the county I live in. The Cumberland County Fair opened this week and it is quite the sight to see. I should know because I’ve seen it!
My friends and I had gone to the little carnival in the parking lot of the Food Lion, and that was a good warm up for what awaited us at the county fair. While the carnival had rides and a midway, the fair has all sorts of exhibits, concerts, competitions and animals. It didn’t take much asking to find a few friends to share in some fair fun. Felisha hadn’t come on an adventure with me lately and I missed her, so she was first on my list of friends to invite along. Jibbers and Cami seemed to enjoy the carnival, so I figured they would get a kick out of the fair. My trusty sidekick and ever hopeful voice of reason, Bobbi, agreed to tag along as well. I had seen Corny heading out for the Walmart earlier in the day and had invited him to come along and he said he would fly by the fair when he was finished his parking lot greeter shift.
We had to get a ride to the fair, so we told my brother, Tristan, that there were going to be packs of pretty girls roaming all around the fairgrounds. Since there really were scantily clad women at the beach as we had promised last time, he agreed to be our chauffeur. Since I didn’t want to spend all our time at the food stands, I hadn’t mentioned the fair to Malcolm. The four of us crept out the front door and tip toed to the car looking around to see if Malcolm was lurking somewhere. We scurried the last few feet and flung open the door and jumped in the car and landed right on top of Malcolm. After he extracted himself from the pile of critters, he explained that he had been under the deck and had heard us plan our expedition. He just knew we wanted him to come along! I figured it would probably be a good idea to have another male for Jibbers to hang out with, so I didn’t say anything about Malcolm coming along. But somehow I knew Malcolm was going to be trouble…..
As we neared the fair site, we could see all the lights and giant rides rising up over the horizon. Bobbi started getting nervous when she saw a ride with a giant arm swinging around wildly. She made me promise that we would NOT go on that ride. I told her not to worry since I was more interested in the other activities and not the rides.
After Tristan found a parking space, he turned to us and told us to meet him back at the car in 2 hours. I promised we would try – but since none of us wore a watch (or could even tell time for that matter) it would be hit or miss. Tristan drew a picture of what the clock would look like in two hours and entrusted it to me. I put it under my hat and prayed I would not lose it in all the fun.
As we wandered down the midway we made note of what we wanted to do later. We decided that first we would check out the exhibits. We went into this HUGE room – the expo center. As soon as Malcolm spied the food he was gone. I yelled after him that the food was for exhibit and not to be eaten. I was hoping he heard me or we would be heading home sooner that we wanted to!
The rest of the gang and I wandered up and down the aisles looking at all the beautiful animals. Rabbits, chickens, goats, sheep – all the barnyard varieties of animals were there. I was hoping none of our little group would be scooped up and placed on a judge’s table! There was some judging going on at one end of the expo center. Since I love a good competition, we walked down to where the judging was going on. Much to my dismay, there was Malcolm standing at the table with the other entrants. I tried to motion to him to step away, but he thought I was waving at him, so he waved back. I shook my head no, but it was too late. The judge walked up to the table to start evaluating the entrants’ chickens.



I couldn’t watch so we headed back out toward the midway. A few minutes later Malcolm came running out of the exhibition hall – a moment later his bucket of chicken came flying out the door also. Evidently, the judge was not amused. I have a feeling the chickens were not amused either!
Before we reached the midway, we saw a crowd of people standing around an oval pen. We asked someone what was going on and they replied that everyone was waiting for the pig races to begin. Pig races?!?!??!?! Pigs don’t race. I know horses and dogs have been known to race, but not pigs!! This I had to see. We joined the folks milling about, but when I turned to say something to Bobbi, she was gone. So was Cami. I asked Jibbers and Felisha if they knew where they had gone, but they said they had no idea. Suddenly, a bell rang and the little gate opened up and the racing pigs came jumping out. . I felt bad that Bobbi and Cami were going to miss the pig races – until I turned to watch the race.



There were Bobbi and Cami just having a good ol’ time jockeying a couple of pigs. They were just bouncing up and down like crazy on the backs of the pigs. Poor Cami could hardly hold on and she had to grab her pig’s ears to keep from falling off. Even though neither Bobbi’s nor Cami’s pig won, they had a great time and were just giggling away when we met up with them after the race.
Next we came upon a bunch of ponies. Their owner was giving free pony rides. While Bobbi and Cami had had enough riding for one day, Felisha, Jibbers and I decided we would partake in the more sedate riding experience. We found some appropriate riding hats, and jumped aboard.



I had never ridden a real pony before, and I just loved the rhythm of the pony’s steps. We pretended we were moseying along on the range. I was sad when our time was up. I patted my pony on the nose and thanked him for the ride. Felisha and Jibbers also enjoyed the ride!
We found someone with a watch and compared the picture Tristan had drawn to the watch’s face. It looked like we still had plenty of time to continue our fair experience. Felisha suggested we might have fun playing one of the many games on the midway. But which one? We wandered up and down the rows of games until we came to the perfect one. I’m afraid of clowns and nothing would please me more than shooting a clown with water until his head exploded. Well, maybe it was more like shooting the clown in the mouth until a balloon on top of its head popped. Either way, I liked the idea of shooting at clowns!
Malcolm had wandered off toward the funnel cake stand, so it was up to the rest of us to take on the clowns. I learned very quickly that ferrets are quite the good shots with water pistols. One after another, Jibbers popped his clown’s balloon. I did win one time, but I know Jibbers was being nice and let me win. That’s okay – it was fun hearing the balloon pop! Corny showed up to cheer us on.



Every now and then one of us would “accidently” hit him with some water and he would squawk and flap his wings. After a while he grew tired of us soaking him and headed home. He was tired from working all day anyway, so he needed to go get some rest.
After all his winning, Jibbers had this huge pile of tickets. We had spent a lot of time at that game, and we figured it was probably time to head back to the car. Jibbers piled his tickets on the shelf and told the attendant he was ready to redeem them. We were all anxious to see what he had won. When the attendant walked up with this giant bear we all gasped. Wow! We all thought it was great until we realized we would have to somehow carry it to the car. I sent Bobbi to find Malcolm, and when they returned we all got together and hoisted it up and started toward the parking lot.




The walk back to the car seemed a lot longer than the walk from the car to the fair. I guess schlepping a big bear makes it seem that way! Tristan was waiting at the car and when he spied us he ran up to carry Jibber’s trophy for him. He sat the bear in the car with us which must have looked funny to people passing us on the road. Tristan was nice enough to drive Jibbers and Cami to their house so he could help them take the bear inside. Tristan rang the doorbell and Jibber’s and Cami’s Mom was very surprised when she saw the bear. We all waved to her from the car and she laughed and waved back.
We dropped Felisha off next. I promised her I would not let it go so long between adventures and I would see her again soon. She politely thanked Tristan for the ride home and gave me a big hug before heading into her house. It was time to head to our house and take a nice long nap after all the excitement of the fair. The fair is open for over a week, so I think I will be going back again.
Hope you have a wonderful weekend. If there’s a fair in town make sure to go – you’ll have a blast!

Love & kitty kisses,
Josie

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Tooth a Vet I Went

Hello again blog readers! I am happy to offer up a brand spankin’ new blog this week! Though I do wish it was a carefree, happy tale instead of the story of a cat losing some of her necessary parts!
It all started with a seemingly harmless, though annoying, trip to the vet’s office for my distemper shot. As I have said before, my temper is usually fine until I am whisked away from the comfort of my home, stuffed into a carrier and poked and prodded by a stranger! But since I had no choice in the matter, I went along and behaved myself. During the course of the vet’s routine inspection, she discovered that my back gums were verrrry red and that my lymph nodes were swollen. I spent the next hour giving up blood and other bodily stuff that I won’t elaborate on, so that they could determine that there was nothing seriously wrong with me. I was prescribed some antibiotics and a steroid and sent on my merry way.
I took my pills like a good girl, hoping that it would help keep me from having to go back to the vet. Unfortunately, exactly one week later, I returned and watched as the vet and my Mom celebrated the good news of the improvement in my condition. Good, I thought, this is the last time this year I shall have to come here!
It was only a few days later when I noticed that my food bowl mysteriously disappeared one evening. I tried sitting in the spot where it used to be, hoping one of the humans would notice the bowl was missing and do something to remedy the situation. That didn’t work. I tried yelling at them and smacking at their legs, but they ignored me. The next morning when I was really hungry and grouchy, Mom picked me up and stuffed me into my carrier. Oh great, not again! I KNOW she’s not seriously going to take a starving cat to the vet!
This time it was even worse. Mom handed me over to one of the vet techs and walked out. This did not bode well as to how my day was going to go. I was taken to the back to sit among the other poor creatures who had no idea what was in store for them. I sat quietly and listened to all the dogs yap.
It wasn’t long before the vet came to get me and put me on a table. The last thing I remember was being stabbed by a needle before drifting off to sleep. When I awoke I felt different. Boy was my mouth sore. Yikes! I moved my tongue around…something felt different. My teeth! I was missing a bunch of teeth!
I meowed loudly to anyone who passed by. I couldn’t understand that no one was concerned that some of my teeth were missing! The vet came by to check on me and she acted like she couldn’t hear me. She petted me and told me everything was alright, but it wasn’t!! She gave me a shot of something that made me not care about my teeth… or anything else.
Mom finally came to pick me up late that afternoon. I was really feeling no pain by then, and I rolled around in my carrier as Mom and the vet talked. I loudly chattered endlessly to Mom the whole drive home. I had so much to tell her! She, too, seemed unconcerned about my loss of teeth. Maybe Dad and Tristan would care!
Mom released me from the carrier and I bounded out. Then the real trouble began. Mom and Dad started to giggle at my legs. I hadn’t even noticed! Someone had shaved my one leg and put a purple bandage on the other!



How undignified! I pulled on the purple bandage hoping someone would take it off. If I had at least had one normal leg that would help.
It worked. Mom came over and unraveled the pretty purple gauze only to reveal a shaved leg just as horrible as the other one. Now I really looked ridiculous!



Oh, this was just awful!!! Everyone was so busy giggling at my legs, that they didn’t even notice my lack of teeth. I finally had enough and opened my mouth as wide as it would go and just sat like that waiting for someone to notice.



Mom came over and took a look, scrunched up her face and looked away. Then she popped the top on a can of Fancy Feast chicken and cheddar kitty food and I forgot all about my legs and teeth. I was so hungry it seemed like the best kitty food ever!!!! The soft food felt good on my sore mouth and I gulped it down. Maybe this tooth pulling episode wasn’t that bad after all!
With my belly now full, it was time to take a rest. That’s when Mom and Dad noticed the difference in my mouth. Dad announced that I now had a permanent “Elvis snarling lip” look to me. Mom checked it out and gigglingly agreed. Since Elvis Pressley was evidently quite popular in his day, I figured it wasn’t too bad a thing. What do you think?



Mom hugged me and told me I was beautiful no matter what. She promised to take me to buy a new hat as soon as I was up to it. I think I’ll milk this tooth extraction thing for all it’s worth… lots of Fancy Feast , hats and extra cuddles!
Well, I better go rest and look pathetic. I’m getting hungry and I want to make sure the top gets popped on another can of Fancy Feast!!
Have a good week!

Love and kitty kisses,
Josie

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Catty Shack

Happy Friday! Happy weekend! Happy happy tail!! I am happy (that’s a lot of happys!) to report that my tail is just about back to normal. It still turns a little to one side and has one spot that is still out of my control, but for the most part I am able to express myself once again. I did not like walking around looking unhappy – that is so un-me!!
My friends and I were sitting around finishing up the last of the food that I had accumulated from my well wishers the week before, when Corny came flying out of the sky and landed clumsily on the deck railing. He started telling us about the men with sticks beating a small defenseless white creature in the green field at the end of the block. We all agreed what an outrage that was and we asked Corny to lead the way to the scene of this injustice.
When we arrived on the scene, the vigilante cardinals were already taking action. They had surrounded the poor defenseless white creature to protect it - but I didn’t see anyone with sticks.



We asked the cardinals what was going on and they eyed me suspiciously. “Who wants to know?” the head cardinal sneered. I remembered then that they did not like me. “A band of concerned citizens,” I replied. The cardinals told us the same story that Corny had relayed but they called it an egg instead of a white creature.
I went over to the egg/creature and sniffed it thoroughly. I poked it with my nose and then gave it a gentle tap with my paw. I started to laugh as I told the others that this wasn’t a creature, it was a ball. It was a special kind of ball – a golf ball.
Evidently, none of my cohorts had watched golf on TV and had no idea how the game worked. Both my Dad and brother play and they had explained it to me when we watched it on TV. I looked around and saw a golf cart with a couple of sets of golf clubs just sitting on the fairway. There was no one around so I thought perhaps the course was trying to drum up some business by offering free cart and club rentals. I asked my friends if they were up to learning a new sport and they enthusiastically said YES!
After I spent several minutes convincing the vigilante cardinals that the golf ball was not an egg, I asked for a volunteer to take the first swing. Jibbers said that he was the first out of the airplane when we sky dived… sky dove… skied dived… went parachuting, so it was someone else’s turn to be the first to try something.
Bobbi volunteered to be the first and she grabbed a club and addressed the ball. “Hellooooo ball” (sorry I couldn’t resist.)



She’s a little thing but she smacked it with all her squirrel might and it flew through the air and landed on the green. We all clapped in appreciation of her skill and decided we would ride down to the ball in the golf cart.
We had a small problem though. None of us was built to drive a golf cart. Several of us tried to stretch way out and reach the gas pedal while holding on to the steering wheel, but it didn’t work. Even Cali with her long legs couldn’t do it. We put our heads together and came up with a plan. Skippy would steer the cart while Jibbers worked the pedals. Most of us climbed aboard and waited to start our fun ride. I think Jibbers got confused and pressed on both pedals at once. The cart revved up but did not move. Then Jibbers figured out what he had done and released the brake. That’s when the wild ride began. The cart popped a wheelie and we took off on two wheels.



Clubs and cats went flying!! Woooohooooo! Hammy and Skippy were just giggling away as Cali, Tank and I were flung in the air.
It didn’t take Jibbers long to get the hang of it, and we were sailing around the golf course with ease. Every now and then someone would get out of the cart and hit a golf ball, but we really never got serious about the game.
After we spent a while in the heat, we all started to get punchy. Somehow Malcolm had gotten his hands on some chicken – I don’t want to know how – and had made a chicken kabob with a golf club. I told him to take the chicken off the golf club – it was going to make the club all greasy! He ignored me so I started to swat at him with a golf club of my own. He swatted back and we started a sort of sword fight. Cali and Jibbers were getting bored with golf and climbed a tree. Corny was fed up with the whole thing and decided that the only way the little white golf ball was going to end up in the hole was if he put it there. He picked it up and flew over to the hole and dropped it in.



It was getting late so we all climbed back into the golf cart and headed back to the hole that was at the end of our street. We left the cart and clubs (some greasier than others) where we found them and headed home.
I hope you have a fun weekend! Drag your friends out to try something new!
Love & kitty kisses,
Josie